Sunday, December 12, 2010

Parenting Pockmarks

Some time ago, prolly like three or four months, Spouse and I were talking.  We do a lot of that, you know, this talking.  These little audible discourses are something I look forward to.  Mostly because he uses big words and I can look 'em up on the mePhone dictionary.  "Hold that thought dear," I'd say.  "Lemme look that one up.  Now, how do you spell it again?"

I tell you what, he wouldn't be all that fun to argue with.  He could throw an insult my way and I wouldn't even know it.  By the way, that sentence was structured as such, in the future tense, because we never argue.  Ever.  Except for maybe that common marital squabble over the division of household labors.  These so-called "arguments" aren't vocabulary builders because there aren't many glossarial alternatives for "Why didn't you take out the effing garbage?!"  

After some careful research, I sit here corrected. There are many alternatives for both "effing" and "garbage."  I won't go into effing, because that one lacks creativity.  Garbage on the other hand has many opportunities.  There's debri, detritus, drek, dregs, dross, filth, junk, offal, rubble, slop, and waste. Expand on it a bit and you get, "Why didn't you take out that odorous potpourri of slop?!"

We should argue more.  That was fun.

ANYWAY (insert big sigh here), the point of this post is a little conversation Spouse and I had and then perhaps a visual aid that our clever little Yahoo #1 provided earlier today.  So Spouse and I are talking about the Yahoos three or four months ago.  Specifically, we were talking about what they were good at and maybe some stuff they need help with.  During this discussion, Spouse said something along the lines of, "I think I've scarred the Yahoos for life."

You wanna hear my home-run, sock-it-to-em, kung-pow response?  "Well isn't that the point?  To scar our kids into being adults?"

It's totally the point folks.  Scar 'em into being adults.  Scar them into saying please and thank you.  Scar them into learning that money, talents, and resources come only with hard work.  Scar away entitlement.  Scar them into considering others.  Scar away abusive actions.  Scar them into respecting themselves and others.  Scar away the self-absorbed.  Scar them into helping others.

While we're scarring our Yahoos into being adults, we'll do some scarring on ourselves as well.  After all, we're still becoming adults, right?  We learn from our scars.

Evidently Yahoo #1 has figured out our diabolical design.  He was reading one of his many Calvin and Hobbes books, and decided to show me this one:




Winder said...

You better watch out for Yahoo #1 I think he is going turn out just like his father.

Makell said...

Usually I can pick up on sarcasm, but I'm not sure on this one... Do you and Spouse really never argue? Say it isn't so!

rabidrunner said...

Makell, there was plenty of sarcasm. We argue all of the time, in fact we don't get out of bed without arguing first (did you get the sarcasm there?) So the answer is no to never arguing. We argue from time to time. (I know, gasp!)