Friday, May 28, 2010


Our Yahoos have a tendency to get bent.  Really bent.  Like slam-the-door-and-kick-it bent.  Each and every time they get their "undies in an uproar" or their respective "tits in a ringer," I say (sometimes more calmly than others), "manage your frustrations."

Now, those who know me will laugh out loud and maybe fart because I, myself, have no clue how to manage my frustrations.  I'm working on it, though.  Don't cast me aside just yet.  Or perhaps maybe you should cast me aside because I am currently slam-the-door-and-kick-it bent.

Bent, bent, BENT!

Since around Tuesday, I've been planning a post to present my new love affair with the Mac.  I was going to tell you how much I slobber when I play with it.  I was going to tell you how I follow Steve Jobs on Twitter and have accompanying Steve Jobs stuff to go with this Mac Love Affair post.

That's not gonna happen, because the Mac has managed to provide more frustrating fury than I can handle.  The plastic is still on it.  I'm ready to throw it back in the box, drive it over to the dudes in the lime green shirts, and demand my million dollars back.  Hell, I'm tempted to throw the damn thing in the driveway and drive over it.

Someone needs to tell me to Manage My Frustrations, right?  I mean, it's a Mac.  It's the most wonderful piece of machinery in the universe.  Yadi yadi yadi.

The thing is, up until Tuesday, when all 27 inches of the meMac were 10 days old, I was singing wonderful universe machinery praises.  But on Tuesday, afternoon to be precise, the Airport quit working.  (Airport is Mac-speak for wifi, just in case you didn't know that like I didn't know that.)

No Internet.  Everyone knows that in these new-fangled times, a computer without internet is worthless.

I have no internet on the meMac.  We have three PCs and a mePhone.  The PCs and mePhone are talking to the internet through wifi, just fine.  I have called Apple twice.  They say it's my ISP.  I have spoken with the ISP twice.  They have had me moving the monster around the house, to test each nook and cranny.  We have changed security protocols, channels and passwords.  The ISP says it's Apple, because the PCs work just fine.

The runaround.  Apple blames ISP.  ISP blames Apple.  

For a final test, I load the meMac in the car, and drive it to Vera's.  I plug it in, click on her network, enter her password and voila.  I have internet.  Come back home, do the same.  I have no internet on the Mac.  We have Internet everywhere else, but no internet on the Mac.  Still.  I called the ISP again.  They tell me to buy a new modem for eighty dollars.

Somebody tell me to Manage My Frustrations, because I'm about to lose it.  I have spent 4 (four) hours today working on this.  I do not have four hours to work on a petty little issue like internet connectivity.

To top it off, it looks like rain is coming.  I'm tired of rain.  I live in Utah, for crying out loud! It's a DRY DAMN STATE -- in more ways than two.



megan said...

hmmm...I'd like to leave a comment...but I have none :)

Jessica said...

You could just "borrow" Vera's modem. Seems like it works fine!

PhishTako said...

Have you tried to plug your Mac directly into router instead of going wireless?

radracer said...

I'd take it back to the lime green shirt people and get your million back. Then you can experience new PC joy three times for the price o' one MacMac. (Of course, I wouldn't have let it in the house in the first place because Mrs. radracer spends the school year surrounded by PCs, and she pretty much knows how to make them do as she wishes. She has no use for computer-type things that don't what she wants them to.)

Mrs. has lunch occasionally with computer-network-geek types, and she tells me that they won't allow mePad's on their network because they hog too much internet bandwidth. Since we're into sharing and playing nicely in the sandbox, anything that appears to be hogging more than it's share of the resources gets banned from the playground.

If the Mac can't play nicely with the other hardware, I'd say it's time to send back.

Makell said...

Oh I hear you - but don't give it up yet! We had an HP printer/wireless connectivity issues that we couldn't get resolved for over a few weeks and I was ready to throw it out the window. I was wondering if I needed to go to anger management classes - they can make you crazy(er)!
Any luck so far? We had problems with our qwest wireless modem and bought the apple airport deal which works pretty well.
We had no running water or a dryer that was working for a week if that makes you not feel as lonely in your misery!

Sparks said...

Is this solved? Isn't Vera's son-in-law a Mac wizard?

This is anomalous, by the way--Macs are built to be plug and play. And did you get Apple Care? That might be useful in this sitchewashun.

I'm so sorry that you've not had a musical experience with your Mac. I wouldn't swear by Apple if my experience wasn't positive and vast. We have four Macs and two iPhones and two iPods and an Apple TV and a whatever that Apple Internet thinger is and I have nothing but love. To contrast, like everyone else, I've used PCs for, what?, the last 15 or so years, and I harbor buckets of frustration-inspired animosity.

rabidrunner said...

The saga continues! Yes, Phistako Phriend, direct ethernet works just fine. However, I had grown to LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the airport express thing broadcasting my tunes all over the house. Without the airport, that does not work.

Makell, the running water and broken dryer wins. Any luck with that? Just make sure none of them run on wireless ANYTHING!

Sparks, I have applecare. It's not doing anything to help in this particular shitshuwashun. (Emphasis on shit.)

The update is: Bought a new router. Spent three hours trying to configure it with the help of two support people (Qwest and Netgear). No internet for anything -- PCs or MAC, ethernet or WiFi. After arguing with the last support rep over whether or not I have a static IP address (which I do and pay $10 a month for), I told her to stuff it. I'm taking the dang thing back tomorrow. So, basically, I paid $120 for more frustration.

Next step? E-mail to the original router people, actiontec, to see if there's a known problem. Interestingly enough Qwest didn't suggest a firmware update. That one seems like a no-brainer.

I think I'll go get a pedicure now.

Aubrey said...

I think that MAC is cryptic. My MAC has it's own terms and conditions. It's sort of like dealing with my female cat. I have the same issue with mine. As long as I don't use certain applications while using the internet it doesn't freeze. The funny thing though, is that if the PC does something crazy, wizard husband saves the day. Should the MAC freeze we panic and think the end of the world is coming. Cryptic.

Tia said...

Hell almighty, girl! I sense your frustration! I have a friend who is Mac friendly... maybe he could offer some sound advice?

I still appreciate the entertainment of your blog, though. Hold nothing back! Tell us how you REALLY feel! And then go for a nice long run in the rain. OR come down here and run with me in the sunshine!

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