Monday, January 04, 2010

The Lost Training Plan

Do you know what happens in four weeks? The season premiere of Lost. It's three hours long! That's three hours of "No way!" and "I didn't see that coming," and "You idiot! Don't do that." and "Remember? They referred to that in Season x, Episode y!"

We do a lot of yelling at the TV during our favorite TV show. It's better than football.

Since the season premier of the sixth and final season is in four weeks, I need to get crackin'. My Lost knowledge is out of shape. You might say I'm fat and slow. Or slow and fat. Whatever. I need to get training for I've only recapped/refreshed Season One.

With only four weeks to go, I've come up with a training plan:

  • Week 1, the toughest and most strenuous - Monday: 4 x Season 2, Tuesday: 4 x Season 2, Wednesday: 4 x Season 2, Thursday: Rest day, dinner at Sister's house, Friday 6 x Season 2, Saturday: ski day no TV, Sunday: 6 x Season 2. Completes the 24 episode Season.

  • Week 2, almost as strenuous as week 1 but not quite - Monday: 5 x Season 3, Tuesday: 2 x Season 3 (active recovery), Wednesday: 5 x Season 3, Thursday: 6 x Season 3, Friday: Rest and recovery, Saturday: Leave open for ski day, Sunday: 4 x Season 3. Completes the 22 episode Season.

  • Week 3, remember the writer's strike? Yeah, Season 4 is short. But this is good timing, because we'll need a "chill" week after the intensities of Seasons 2 and 3. Monday: 3 x Season 4, Tuesday: 3 x Season 4, Wednesday: Rest, Thursday: 3 x Season 4, Friday, 1 x Season 4, Saturday: Ski day, Sunday: 3 x Season 4. Completes the 13 episode Season.

  • Final week, I know you're tired, but keep it up! You're doing great! Monday: 4 x Season 5, Tuesday: 3 x Season 5, Wednesday: 5 x Season 5, Thursday: Rest, Friday: 2 x Season 5, Saturday: Rest and ski, Sunday: 6 x Season 5. Completes the 17 episode Season.

This training program is not for everyone. As always, consult your physician and/or psychiatrist before engaging in any rigorous activity. And you'll prolly put on weight what with the butt not leaving the couch 'n all...

(I'm such a geek. Such a geek.)


Lars said...

That is intense. I once did this to catch up with 24...not sure I could pull this off. God Speed Rabid.

Carol said...

Can you please recap each episode for those of who are too lame to actually rewatch all of them??? I'll be looking for daily posts on this!!

Jessica said...

Crap. I feel like I'm behind already! And that my behind is growing just looking at this schedule. Do you think it's okay to avoid all homework and just watch LOST? You do. Great. Could you write a note for my teachers?

rabidrunner said...

Oh how I would love to host the clif notes versions of all the episodes. Sadly I don't have time. Sadly.

Hey Jessica, I'll get right to work on that note:

Dear Dr. Sorensensensensen,
Please excuse Jessica from attending class, completing assignments, and taking exams. She is smack dab in the middle of a study in the which she documents the brain activity associated with humans and dogs while watching science fiction.

Oh and while you're at it, make sure she makes the Dean's list next semester. That'd be great. Thanks.


(How's that?)

Sparks said...

Such a[n organized] geek.

rookie cookie said...

I recently finished watching all the seasons for the first time. Love that show. Ethan and I had originally started watching all of the episodes together and then he started watching them late at night while I slept. He was basically cheating on me. It wasn't very cool. But then I started my infidelities and I finished all the episodes before him. And I was a brat and would tell him the big endings before he saw them. It seemed only fair.

I too am quite excited about season 6. But with the season premier being such an event, I know that my children will barf everywhere or all of the sudden decide to not sleep. I feel like that happens every time we get excited for a show.

Jessica said...


Thanks for the note. I will be emailing it to all my professors.

Also, does your Sister know we are all coming over for dinner on Thursday? I really like sweet potato fries, just in case she's taking requests.