November 16, 2008
Since embarking on the Consumer Cleanse, I've reached my first temptation. Ironically, this temptation happened at church.
We have church at the dreadful hour of 2:00pm. You'd think that a late meeting would reduce the stress and/or anxiety of getting there on time (so as to get a soft cushy seat), but it doesn't. We usually run out of the door frazzled, waving our arms and yelling at each other.
Today was no different except we arrived at church with 5 minutes to spare. The reason, you ask? Because the clocks at home were set backwards 55 minutes instead of the congressionaly prescribed one hour. It wasn't on purpose, but it's beginning to look like a good idea.
So as we sat there in the church breathing heavily from the rush, I got nervous. Those of you who know me can testify (notice the various sorts of church lingo today) that I have trouble sitting still. (You should know, however that it runs in the family. For the record these familial fidgets will keep me from booking another airline flight next to any of my blood relatives.)
Anyway, I'm nervous and fidgety and my hands begin to explore the wrinkles and rings of each other. What do these hands discover, you ask? I forgot to clip the nails! This can be a catastrophe! I play the pie-anno in the prie-mary and those lengthy rascals prohibit me from hitting the black keys without slipping. This results in many wrong notes and is not good.
While anticipating the demise of the impending performance, I thought to myself, "I should keep a spare set of clippers in my church bag. That would be great! Then if I forget to do it at home, I can leave ten tiny shards of my DNA on the floor of the chapel. That's it! I'll get another pair of clippers."
I even began to justify. "They're only 3 bucks. I can certainly justify 3 bucks for my church duties." But then the Organ began to play and I remembered that I was in the middle - well at the very very VERY front end - of the Consumer Cleanse.
No matter the size or the cost, no purchase is acceptable. Am I hardcore or what?!