Saturday, August 30, 2008

I wanna be sedated

Saturday August 30, 2008

Just get me to the airport put me on a plane
Hurry hurry hurry before I go insane
I can't control my fingers I can't control my brain
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba
I wanna Be Sedated

They say that the secret to a successful, fulfilling, rewarding, joyful, life... is finding joy in everyday moments. But the truth is, I don't find it at all fun to get after my housemates to flush after they finish, pick up their dirty undies, turn off lights, shut the door after coming in or out, or throw away that milk carton that just so happens to be RIGHT NEXT TO the garbage can.

And the chores... OH THE CHORES. The laundry, the toilets, the dusting, the fighting over tooth brushing, piano practicing, and going to a movie or the pool. That last one gets me. Since when do youngsters need coercing for fun? Spoilt. That's what they are and I suppose it's all my fault. Everything else is my responsibility why not throw in their crappy attitudes? Apples don't fall too far from trees...

Most of the time I can find some humor in it all. Now? Not so much. I've been sick for a week and I've seriously needed that week to wallow in bed with a lusty novel and three boxes of aloe vera laced tissue. But you all know what happens when you take a few off right? You wake to chaos.

The kicker to the chaos of today (after my hour and a half rest)? Turning on the hose to water flowers only to have the dang hose burst and soak my white t-shirt. Trust me. My neighborhood isn't exactly the right place for a wet t-shirt contest. And my neighborhood didn't appreciate the explicative either.

The other kicker? Finding the puddle of water at the bottom of the freezer, only to look up in horror at the dang thing being left open a crack. Open the freezer further and voila! half of it had thawed. Being as we're in the midst of an economic bump (a few steps beneath a crisis), this ain't good news. There's around 700 bucks in meaty chunks that need cooking. Not to mention my precious popsicles. In their liquified state I promptly, with the rage of 18 evil rock stars, threw them out and stomped on 'em.

Sadly I didn't feel better. I had to clean it up.

Truth is... I'd be a better person if I could "Roll With The Punches" and declare things as "It Is What It Is." Sometimes it's not so easy when you're the one primarily responsible for things being as "It Is What It Is."

It's time to defragment. And the first step to the defragmentation of my filled-with-crap life? Throw out the plants. All of them. No more living plants that need watering. Next year the grass will be astro turf.

There is a bright side, however. Spouse and I have plans to travel to Vermont on Thursday. But being as today is how today is, there's another [surprise!] bump. The babysitters are going to Vermont too and we have no one to take the children. Actually. Let me rephrase that. We can't think of anyone we dislike enough to impose on.

Maybe Spouse will go on that romantic getaway sans his wife-o-the-year. Can you see him smiling now? Sweet! No wife!


Mandee said...

Amen. Amen. Amen. We live the same crappy life.

And I will take your Yahoos if they are willing to stay with us. I won't yell at my kids while they're here, and maybe make some popcorn. For reals.

Julia said...

Ouch! Way bad week. I'm so sorry that you've been sick. Do you need a visit from a friend who loves to clean? (That crazy friend is me, by the way.) Let me know...really.

Staci said...

Ok that was all funny and everything until I got to the last paragraph. NO ONE and I mean, NO ONE has the right to mess with a trip. That just made me mad. What kind of irresponsible, selfish . . .

Oh, I just read that last comment; do you really have a friend who loves to clean?

You know I really try to be a positive person because I figure no one wants to hear my ranting but would you believe me if I told you that sometimes I feel like flushing myself down a self-pity toilet? Only then I don't because it would get clogged and I would have to clean it myself.

rabidrunner said...

Mandee darling, you're so very kind. But see (don't you love a good butsee?)... you have 5 (F-I-V-E) kids. You'd need a clubwagon to go anywhere if my kids were there. Especially since they're as rowdy as 4 to 6 specials.

Sides, Spouse found a babysitter! He's my Knight in Shining Armor. Must mean he wants me there after all!?

And Julia... you like to clean? What a talent that is. The best however is that you are in my ward so I can, like, call the RS President, tell her my troubles, and she'll send you! Maybe I could get her to send around a clipboard with availble time slots.

And Staci, my dear. Oh how I miss you. You are so darned funny and I'm so happy you caught the humor of it all! We should seriously have "Self-Pity Saturdays". We could write about how awful everything is - it would be great because there's no mess. Blog cleanup is a cinch. (Unless of course you openly trash someone.)

Andrea Brown said...

Wow. Crappy!!! Hope it gets better and hope you can go on the vaca!!

Becca said...

I'm sorry about the crappy week! Have fun in Vermont and let's get together when you get back!

megan said...

Ha!!! I was going to track you I don't have to...and I picked this post to comment on...'cause it was the best AND it had a happy ending (cue the music)...LOVED hangin' with you guys this weekend...waitin to hear about your trip down to prescott ;)