Tuesday, February 12, 2008

The Corner Office with Lou Who


I shared an office with this girl, let's call her Lou Who. We were Software Geeks working for a software company. Oh the fun we had. One of my favorite Lou Who stories was her scientific method of loading a dishwasher. When we had a gathering, she'd always end up at an already full dishwasher making room for more dishes. When a dishwasher appeared "full", she'd open it and say... "I like to think of the dishawasher as a puzzle" then she'd move things around to make it all fit. With that kind of cram-style loading, I used to think she had a whole house full of dirty dishes. Maybe I should take a photo of a full dishwasher and turn it into a puzzle... for her birthday.

Our office was a big "corner" office - you know the offices that were reserved for big wigs and VPs. Since it was an empty office and we needed a spot, we petitioned our boss for it. "Boss - we could share it!" He moved us from our inner cubicle to that giant corner office. With a door. (To this day I believe whole-heartedly that Boss was an intelligent human, but that decision left many to wonder).

In the late evening hours when we needed a break, Lou Who and I would count the number of offices with "Glamour Shots" or make fun of Spouse (before he was Spouse - those stories need their own post) or tell jokes or talk about fashion. She might be a Software Geek, but she knew how to dress.

We had a friend, we'll call him Chia Pet ('cause we gave him one for Christmas). Chia Pet was an engineer and referred to our office as "The Air Traffic Control Tower". He'd walk in, put on Lou Who's giant head phones and pretend he was directing airplanes. Every Christmas Chia Pet would receive a nice "Prize" from us. In our last years together, he became really scared each time he opened one of our "gifts." One year it was a mouse pad with Lou Who and I picking our noses. Chia Pet had a classy non-geekish wife who I'm sure thought us to be classy as well.

We liked practical jokes. For a while, we played "let's hide some food in someone's office and see how long it takes for them to smell it." PhishTako worked with us then. I think he ended up with a 6 week old banana somewhere in his office. (It wasn't 6 weeks old at the time of its placement but it was 6 weeks old at the time of it's discovery).

Speaking of PhishTako, he had a microphone and loads of other kidish type toys. His office was always a good place to stop and play or sing or dance. He hosted the "Wall O' Bad Hair" where everyone (at least the fun ones) would bring pictures of themselves sporting their worst hair. Every genre and decade was covered on that wall.

And then there was Derelict. Derelict was a decent looking young guy who listened to Beck daily and had a sun tattoo on his calf. (We were in software development so we could wear shorts and sandals with socks to work.) He had this giant white board that wasn't fastened permanently to anything. He lived and breathed that white board. He wouldn't use the labratory (yes the Jon was a place for experiments) without first writing intentions to do so on this white board. That white board was his life - it contained the most important of all information (you know algorithims and formulas and the lyrics to Loser - "I'm a loser babeh so why don't you kill me.") Anyway, PhishTako decides he's going to play a joke and replace the White Board of the Universe with a blank one. So he does. And Derelict strolls into work, turns on the Beck, then yells "Who the [expletive] erased my white board!?!" Lou Who and I laughed so hard we cried.

Those were the good old days. We worked hard. We played hard. And we supported each other. Lou Who spent a great deal of energy looking after me ('cause I needed looking after back then). She will forever be my Guardian Angel. In the Traffic Control Tower of friendship.


The McMillans said...

I was away, and to this day, I am grateful that she was your guardian angel as well.

What a great post, it made me want that job.

PhishTako said...

Those were the good old days. Great people, fun people to work with.

To this day when I see rotten fruit I think "I should take that fruit to work and hide it in someone's office." But then I remember there are very few people in this world who enjoy and appreciate "rotten fruit" wars. On my resume I list "rotten fruit" wars as one of my strong points.

I've thought about hiding rotten fruit in Rabid's home or car but I'm afraid of being arrested. But I've always wanted to be arrested so I could smile for my mug shot. Why don't people smile when their mug shot picture is taken?

Lou Who and Rabid working together was a very entertaining combination. I want to be stinky rich and start my own company that doesn't do anything. I would then hire Lou Who and Rabid and put them in a corner office. That would make my kids very happy. When Rabid left my place of employment my kids were very sad. I think my kids love Rabid more than they love me.

Brooklet said...

I like the white board prank, pure manicale genius! Your story makes me miss working in an office too! Though, I definitely don't think I had as much fun as you guys did in your corner office!

rabidrunner said...

PhishTako... they don't smile because the jailhouse photographer tells them they cannot (don't ask me how I know that).

And your "company that does nothing" - are you saying the Lou Who and I did nothing while working? Huh? Answer that carefully! And if you need proof, I'm sure we can subpoena the bug file.

PhishTako said...

In no way was I saying that you and Lou Who did nothing. If my company did nothing then there would be less pressure at work and thus more time for rotten fruit wars and more time to get tattoos.

Mandee said...

That was awesome. Those sound like great days!

Lois said...

Oh, I want to work there! How fun. The only fun I have at work is watching the geeky computer guys try to pick up on women by asking them to come over and play D&D with them.