Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Happy Halloween!

As with all special ocassions, a playlist is in order.
  1. Batman Theme - The Marketts
  2. Back in Black - AC/DC
  3. Walkin' in a Cemetery - Claudine Clark
  4. Strange Brew - Cream
  5. Spooky - Dusty Springfield
  6. Monster Mash - Bobby "Boris" Picket
  7. Haunted - Poe
  8. Welcome to my Nightmare - Alice Cooper
  9. Witchy Woman - The Eagles
  10. Purple Haze - Jimi Hendrix
  11. 19 Witches - Monster Magnet
  12. The Purple Eater - Sheb Wooley
  13. Superstition - Stevie Wonder
  14. Them Bones - Alice in Chains
  15. Zombie Stomp - Ozzy Osbourne
  16. Brain Damage - Pink Floyd
  17. Dragula - Rob Zombie
  18. The Wolfman - Bobby Fuller Four
  19. Black Magic Woman - Santana
  20. Strange Days - The Doors
  21. Evil Hoodoo - The Seeds

So... what are you "dressing up" as? Or if you are reading this after the fact (say, in November some time), what did you "dress up" as? Please share.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Politics and "Trunk" or Treating

When government provides a service it destroys the private sector (Sector 12? Sector 12? Come in Sector 12!) Today I will attempt to illustrate this point using the "Trunk" or Treat phase that's sweeping the nation. Okay, so maybe it's just sweeping my neighborhood. (I really wish however, that someone would sweep my garage instead.)

Anyway, here's how it works. Neighborhoods/church congregations designate a location. Those who wish to participate drive their cars to location, open their trunks and make themselves available to distribute candy. Kids dressed in costume go from trunk to trunk, saying something lame like "Trunk or Treat" then walk away with sweets. The whole process takes about 20 minutes.

Many people enjoy it. Parents love it because they don't have to drag their snot nosed blubbering children around the neighborhood. They also love it because it's "safe." (Whatever happened to the fear of razor blades in the loot? Come on! That's what Halloween is all about - FEAR! Well that and those fun bite sized O'Henry bars.) Kids love it because they are able to acquire 30 bucks worth of candy within a minimal time frame (that's a $90 an hour wage - tax free!)

If you wish to participate it's great for you. If you don't then you're stuck at home in a dark neighborhood listening to the theme from Psycho over and over while you anxiously wait for the bell to ring. And the kids? If they go door-to-door (like we used to way back when and heaven forbid we get some exercise), it's a never-ending stream of black door steps ('cept for Stu and Vera, they're the traditional wacky sort).

See how this is like government? If you remove the private sector (Sector 13! Sector 13! Do you read me Sector 13?!) you have no choice. You can do what everyone else is doing or choose not to participate. Wouldn't it be great if we all had the same health care?! Fun! All the doctors could designate a location and a service. And we could go from doctor trunk to doctor trunk getting our loot. We'd be done in 20 minutes.

You could rummage the village for the private traditional doctors, but then you might end up with some quack like Stu or Vera.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Today's Friday Flashback (Episode 1)

Today's Friday Flashback is brought to you by leg warmers. They're not just functionally warm, they're fashionably haute. (I'm trying a new tradition. Let's see if it happens next Friday.)

Bronski Beat is an English/Scottish synth pop band that entertained from 1983 on. The members include Jimmy Somerville, Steve Bronski, and Larry Steinbachek. They're somewhat popular - mostly amongst the community who gets it's kicks from those of the same sexual orientation (there's a theme this week eh?) This band could be classified as the Indigo Girls of the 80s. Only they're boys. And they're not folk. And there's no guitars. The music of Bronski Beat consists of synthesizers, tenoresque falsetto, and pre-techno beats. Very fun.

Watch/listen to Smalltown Boy.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007


Spouse has gone hunting. The kids are asleep, I'm in bed trying to read my book about a literary genius going through rehab (he's hilarious by the way... can make rehab laugh out loud funny). And while I try to concentrate on each giant look into his personal 12 step recovery, I hear the creepy sounds of the house working... something that happens only when I'm home alone (at least when I'm home without Spouse.) Just as I pause to listen to the latest noise (and thus decipher whether it's the water heater or a 3 foot 8 inch green guy with red eyes who wants to steal all of my cds and take them to his planet), the phone rings and I jump.

"What are you doing?" It's Vera. She's got that grinning I just bought a new pair of shoes tone of voice.

I tell her I'm reading my book.

"That book is making you dumb" or something like that. I defend it triumphantly with words of how clever and funny it is and then, "Oooooh hooo hooo ho ho! You will need to check your mailbox in the morning." Which means she's about to share music with me. When this happens (and it does often) the anticipation drives me crazy and induces a sleepless night.

I ask her what it is. "It's Mika. It's so gay. You'll love it."

I sleep then retrieve it from the mailbox.

I listen to it while working on Indiana tax forms. It is so gay and do I ever love it!

Spouse is home from his killin' spree. He hates it.

Sunday, October 21, 2007

It's the most wonderful time of the year

With one exception:

Pantyhose. Ick.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Rabidrunner Tip o' the Day

Don't brag about your humility.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007


Attention has been called to the mix of characters who folic on our little show. By show, I mean my blog. Many of you know each other, many of you don’t. Many have asked “now how do you know this person…?” or “who the heck is…?” etc. So why don’t we have some introductions?

I’ll start.

I am rabidrunner. I am married (7 years) to Spouse and we have two young boys that I like to call “yahoos.” I test software part time in my windowless basement office. Currently, I test tax filing software. It’s fascinating. I enjoy waking at 5:00am every day to run (hence the runner in rabidrunner). Rabid came from Spouse (evidently he thinks I have a foaming at the mouth problem). I get extremely worked up over music (all types ‘cept new country) and shoes (all types ‘cept cheap ones). I have one brother, one sister and lots of funny friends. Characteristically, I enjoy playing the devil’s advocate in conversations. My love language is humor. If I make fun of you, rest assured that you are loved.

It’s your turn now.

Monday, October 08, 2007

PR is for...

...Practically Reasonable, Personally Rowdy, Portapotty Revulsion, Prancing Roosters and Private Ride. But more importantly, PR is for PERSONAL RECORD as in you’ve (I’ve) personally recorded something better than previously recorded personally.

I arrived home from the Marathon Mayhem to a personalized Welcome Wagon from Vera: Giant mylar numbers (a 3 and a 1 and a 5) and the lyrics to a new song (to be sung to the tune of Jerry Was A Racecar Driver by PRimus” (and yes the PR in PRimus was on purpose).

Rabid* is a marathon runner
And she runs so gosh darned fast
She never did win no checkered flag
But she never did come in last
Rabid is a marathon runner
Hell bent on 26.2
With her number on her chest and her new sneakers on
She’d light them up just for fun

Rabid is a marathon runner
Standing ready at the starting line
She took off like a shot
And I ain’t no liar
She ran like her ass was on fire
Rabid is at her strongest
Strong as any chick alive
She finally grabbed that 3:15
At the ripe old age of 35

Rabid is a rabid runner
35 years old
She trained and trained ‘til she was fine
And ran herself across the finish

Thanks darlin’ for making my life so colorful and audibly pleasing.

*Rabid has been used in place of my real name to protect uh... the innocent.

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Marathon Mix

It's Marathon Week! How about a Marathon Mix for the Pre-race Panic?

  1. Wanna Be Startin' Something - Michael Jackson
  2. How Many Miles Must We March - Ben Harper
  3. Whippin' Picidilly - Gomez
  4. Blue on Black - Kenny Wayne Shepherd
  5. The Best Is Yet To Come - Frank Sinatra
  6. One X One - INXS
  7. Hyper Chondriac Music - Muse
  8. Three Days - Jane's Addition
  9. Run For Your Lives - The Morning After Girls
  10. Big Calm - Morcheeba
  11. Trampled Under Foot - Led Zeppelin
  12. Call Me A Fool - Live
  13. Run On - Moby
  14. All In My Mind - Love and Rockets
  15. Muscle Museum - Muse
  16. Runnin Down A Dream - Tom Petty
  17. Body and Soul - Tori Amos
  18. Hell Yes - Beck
  19. Effect & Cause - The White Stripes
  20. Bottle Up & Go - John Lee Hooker

All hail to the ever faithful carbohydrate. It's time to load.